OK, I’m bored…

Time to check out my horoscope, as worked out by your friendly neighborhood computer.

Apparently I’ve got the Sun in Scorpio, the Moon in Capricorn, my Ascendant in Leo, Saturn in the First House, Venus in the Third House, Bob in the outhouse, the Sun in the Fourth House, and the Moon in the Fifth House.


Your most conscious objective is to acquire power over others. This aim, coupled with your somewhat hard, ambitious nature, can be a source of conflict in your life. Despite these personality factors, there are indications of high attainments. Because of your aggression and fixed habits, you make an excellent executive and overseer of any kind. In power you are exacting in what you require of others, but you make equally stern demands of yourself. You are often gloomy and indulge in brooding. The key to a more harmonious self lies in probing deep into your psyche (you have an innate faculty for probing and incisiveness) to acquire greater self-knowledge.

People with Leo in the Ascendant seem to possess a flare for the life of nobility and regality. Your life will be in many ways influenced by decisions you make that have been motivated by your pride, desire for power, for authority, and your need to convince others of your courage.

In life you will act with a rather frank, generous, and amiable disposition. The course of events in your life will unfold themselves swiftly, and a life full of chance and circumstances will be the outcome of your desire to rule, to organize, to hold the keys of authority. You should be aware that as a result of overly strong impulses there is the danger of failures and upsets in life. You will be generally regarded as an amiable, sincere and generous person who, however, has much pride and sensitivity. Egocentricity is one of the prices of being born with the Ascendant sign of Leo. Another aspect of this zodiacal sign is that your personality becomes excessively charged with passion and sexual desire. On the other hand, these zodiacal signs grant in life a large dose of vitality as well as a fine physical shape and a strong, healthy constitution.

Willpower is a characteristic of your personality. You seek opportunities and when you find them you go to it, using both your mind and your emotions to strive for success with zeal and determination. You are very self-assured and you implement ideas with a self- assurance that lets nothing get in your way of success.

It would be beneficial to you, however, if you were not so candid and frank and if you did not expect others to act and feel as you do.

Leo will grant you very sincere and affectionate relationships in which you desire to bring happiness and an overall feeling of charitable spirit and warmth to your loved one. In your sexual relationships you appear as happy, strong, playful and even a little innocent.

You will always act better as a leader than a subordinate.

The Sun, ruler of your life events, is located in the fourth house. This house has to do with the first and last epochs of one’s life but especially the latter.

Since your ruler is positioned here, throughout the general course of your life any matters connected to your family, parental name, and house will be of extreme importance to you.

I believe the short explaination of this is: You are obviously a dictator in the making. Professions you would excel at include computer programming, market research, or founding an imperial dynasty and conquering Poland.

(BTW, does “a flare for the life of nobility” suggest a tendency to light the ruling classes on fire? I’ll just hope that this was an English error on the part of the programmer and not a genuine prediction…)

(On second thought, maybe not. Hey, I am a distant cousin of Karl Marx…)

(OK, I know, I’m laying it on a bit thicker than usual – but there’s something about having a computer calculate one’s future by astrological means that just seems to really attract it)

Published in: on April 6, 2003 at 21:57  Comments (3)  


  1. If you become a dictator, I will be Miss Yumi to your Shishio. Though, I’m not sure I’ll sacrifice myself like she did. I know I’m good in a fight. 🙂

  2. *Hmmmms*.
    Astrology doesn’t so much predict your future in this example. It more – describes personality probabilities, lifetime themes, obstacles, strengths, weaknesses, and other stuff. It can get incredibly specific, or it can seem vague. Usually it’s the former, though, homonyms not withstanding. 🙂

  3. Hey, if you conquer Poland, can I have a fief?

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